


Here's My Silent Farewell To You (But You May Never Hear Me)

by stultiloquent



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: Ghosts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-21
Updated: 2013-05-21
Packaged: 2017-12-12 12:47:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/811755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stultiloquent/pseuds/stultiloquent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Short drabble, self-explanatory once you've finished it. Also, excuse me for the pretentious title.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Here's My Silent Farewell To You (But You May Never Hear Me)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Don't own, never happened, etc.
> 
> Cross-posted on deviantART.

The light was slipping fast. I must catch the train before night comes, but I had previously promised myself one last look at the boy. I lingered outside the door to his room, peering inside silently.

****

He was asleep.

****

Spontaneously, I drifted nearer. Upon closer observation, I couldn’t help but gasp at the unearthly beauty of this familiar stranger all over again. He was not of this world. He was a scarce gem shining brightly amongst all the ugliness. Untouchable. Unreachable. He wasn’t a sight for a shameful creature like me to behold. To look at him was a sin for me. But I couldn’t resist the temptation. The dangerous pull emitting from him, welcoming me, enticing me, commanding me to be closer.

****

It was all I could do to not hold him. I studied him from afar. His skin was glinting against the limited sunlight, the way moving waters do at dawn. But there was more to the gentle glow. It was coming from under his skin, from within his body. My eyes followed the pathway of the shimmering skin, up his unmoving body, and settled on his face.

****

His hair was draped against the side of his face, daring to be long enough to prick at the neck. It had always been the prettiest hair I’ve ever set eyes on. A feathery curtain, fluttering in the wind. Brown at the roots, turned golden at the tips with the sunlight peeking from behind it. My gaze travelled downwards to find his closed eyes, eyelashes merely eaves temporarily at rest. I knew that behind those lids was a pair of mesmerising eyes, iris of the most delicious brown. Eyes that were, when alive, capable of holding all the wittiest expressions. I knew those eyes well, but I would never be the one to stare into them thereafter. I let my thoughts run away with my memories and my forbidden fantasies.

****

Below the eyes was his nose, a mountain carefully crafted to perfection. I reached out a tentative finger, and traced down the smooth slope of this mountain, pausing at the beginning of the lips. His mouth was twisted into a small smile. I retracted my hand, fearful that he had noticed. His expression remained tranquil, the tender contours of his lips still stretched into a smile. I wondered what he was contented of. It had been a long time since I had last seen his mouth curl upwards.

****

I blinked. Many months ago I would have expected tears, but I had long since forgotten how to cry. I could feel everything going on around me, flashing, changing, pulsating, but I was nonexistent, frozen in time. I had accepted that for a long time now. It was a sacrifice I was willing to make to stay with him, even though I’ve always known that he would never see me.

****

There came the faint swoosh of the train from the farthest corner of the sky. It called to me, beckoning me to join them. I looked out to the windows. I could almost see the stars, and the endless abyss ahead of me, awaiting exploration. But there was still time. I looked back at the sleeping form of the boy I love, his chest rising and falling peacefully. He’s so beautiful. So so beautiful.

****

I kissed him one last time and left his dreams.

****

 

* * *

 

****

Dan opened his eyes, woken by a cool kiss to his forehead.

****

It wasn’t a dream. It wasn’t a dream.

****

It _couldn’t_ be a dream.

****

“Phil?”

 **  
**There was nothing. Nothing but a fragile whisper in the silence.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. :) If you liked this fic, why not check out my other fics as well? xo


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